Memories
by petite etoile22
Summary: after a crash leaves ros without a memory, mace decides to step in and pick up the pieces...rosmace and rosmalcolm later on.DISCLAIMER:I DON'T OWN SPOOKS!please read and review!
1. crash

"You've earned it" those were Harry's last words to her as she left the grid for her three month sabbatical. Ros was now driving home to settle into her well-earned rest. The phone rang and she leant over to connect it to the handsfree set. Ros didn't see the car veering towards her from the other lane. She didn't see how the force of the impact drove her up and against the tunnel wall. Ros was now unconscious. She was unaware of the fact that her car was now spinning through the air at over 90mph. She felt nothing as the car finally landed on its roof, crushed, trapping her inside. She didn't notice the male figure walking away with her bag. She didn't hear the piercing screams or smell the acrid scent of leaking petrol. And even if she had, there was nothing Rosalind Meyers could do about it.

Oliver Mace got back into his car and sped off. He had a limited amount of time for his plan to work.

"Home" he instructed his driver. He would do the basics first. He changed all the names and addresses. He sent men round to remove all the belongings from the flat and store accordingly. When he arrived home, he fabricated and printed all the paperwork and records. As he left, he picked up a small box from the corner of his desk.

Ros had been successfully transferred to the hospital. Nothing major was broken, but she had suffered internal bleeding and severe concussion. Doctors informed that she could suffer memory loss of at least 5 years. The nurse turned to see a very aggravated man standing at her station.

" I-I heard my wife was in here."

The nurse simply indicated in Ros's direction. He sat down, took a ring from his pocket and slipped it onto her finger. In that one fluid movement, Rosalind Mace was born.


	2. home

It was several days before Ros regained consciousness. When she opened her eyes, she was thrown into utter confusion. Ros had no idea where she was, what time it was or how she came to be there. Her body made painful, jerky movements in response to her panic.

" It's alright, you're in hospital" The soft voice belonged to the man sitting beside her bed. She had no idea who he was. Then again, she wasn't sure of anything at the moment. Ros looked down at the man and noticed something glistening on her finger. A ring? Was she married?

" Who are you?" she managed to ask.

" The doctors said there would be some memory loss. I'm your husband, Oliver. You were in a car accident, remember?"

Ros remembered a phone ringing but nothing else. Ros swallowed hard, her uncertainty made her scared.

" Can you pass me my bag?" she asked hoarsely.

" Of course. I'll get some tea and leave you to rest."

Ros was left alone with her thoughts. She opened her bag and dumped the contents onto her lap. She hoped they would help her mend the broken jigsaw puzzle that was currently her life. Licence, cards, ID, they all read Rosalind Mace. But she couldn't remember this man at all. Surely she would remember her husband? The man she loved? Ros fumbled for her notes and found the truth.

Extensive Memory Loss, Patient: R. Mace 

Mace looked over at the sleeping figure of Ros as they drove back home. Home. The house in which Mace had fabricated their entire marital existence. He pulled up to the front door. Ros fluttered her eyelids and began to stir. Mace gently arranged her into her wheelchair.

"ssh. It's alright darling we're home now" he wheeled her indoors.

Harry Pearce was not happy with the letter he had just read. A letter that told him that Ros Meyers had resigned from the service. He might have been slightly happier if he had known that mace had in fact wrote it, but he didn't, so he wasn't. Adam entered the office.

"I got your message. What did you want to tell me?"

"That Ros has just resigned" Harry stated.

"why?"

"and I quote: since on my leave, I have found myself to be a different person. A person who no longer suits the ranks of 5. Hereby accept my resignation and take the remainer of my leave as notice."

"she can't!" adam exclaimed.

"she just did"

A month had passed since Ros had been discharged and she was now fighting fit. Her husband Oliver had helped her fill in the blanks with the aid of photos, films, stories and various other devices. As Ros finished washing the dishes, she smiled to herself. She had gotten her life back. Mace strolled into the kitchen.

"you didn't have to do those"

Ros gave him an affectionate peck on the cheek.

"I know but I wanted to"

Mace pulled her close to him.

"you looking forward to starting work tomorrow?"

"with the world's greatest boss? Of course" she giggled and rested her head on his shoulders.

"well I'm afraid I have a visitor so we're going to be busy"

Ros smiled coyly.

"well you'd better not keep me up then"

Mace scooped her up in his arms.

"I wouldn't dare…"


	3. no sparkle in her eyes

It was early morning and Harry was pacing up and down beside the bed. The meeting with Mace was playing on his mind.

"What's wrong?" asked Ruth, rubbing sleep from her eyes.

"Mace. Something doesn't feel right."

"Nothing ever feels right with Mace. Just go and keep him happy. For all of us. For me."

"I will. For you"

He picked up his coat and left.

What Harry saw as he entered the first part of Mace's office, was not what he expected. Harry saw Ros Meyers sitting behind the PA's desk. He was about to explode but her following actions stopped him short. Ros gave a warm smile.

"Hello. I don't believe we've met before. I'm Rosalind Mace. You must be Mr Pearce. Oliver will see you now"

She ushered him through the door before he could object.

As soon as the door closed, Harry erupted.

"What the hell have you done to her?!" he spat. Mace ignored the question.

"Fabulous woman isn't she?"

"Answer the damn question or I'll give your balls to the press for breakfast"

"Fine. I did nothing. The crash did that to her. I was just there to pick up the pieces."

"By reinventing her entire life!" Harry roared.

"No, just the past 5 years. I don't know why you're surprised Harry. In fact you should've seen it coming. You knew there was a price to pay. Another life in exchange for Ruth's. Well, I took the life. You know the way out."

When Harry returned, the team knew something was wrong.

"It's Ros. She was in a car crash. I'm afraid she's gone." Harry paused before continuing.

"She's lost the last 5 years of her life and Mace has taken the liberty of recreating it for her."

"So who is she now?" Adam asked. The name stuck in his throat for a moment.

"Rosalind Mace"

Ruth slammed her palm down on the table.

"We have to get her back Harry. Mace can't go around destroying peoples lives" Harry shook his head sadly.

"I'm afraid we can't. Not yet anyway. I saw her Ruth and there wasn't a flicker of recognition in her eyes. We've lost her."

Malcolm closed his eyes and tried to block out the pain he was feeling. When a person is dead, you can grieve. But when you walk down the road and know that you could see the woman that you love. The woman that once loved you but now loves another. The woman who will walk past without a sparkle for you in her eyes. When you experience that dread, then you truly hurt. He opened his eyes and stirred his lukewarm coffee. As he turned to leave, he bumped into the woman behind him and tipped the contents of his cup over her blouse.

"I-I am so sorry" he stuttered.

"I-It doesn't matter, I wasn't looking where I was going" she replied embarrassed. When she looked up at him, Malcolm almost cried. It was Ros.


	4. timid

She smiled.

"You can buy me coffee to make up for it" She blushed at her own forwardness. Mace didn't like her being so outspoken. Malcolm cleared his throat.

"S-sure. What would you like?"

He knew the answer before she opened her mouth. A tall Kenyan bean, black, no sugar.

"A tall Kenyan bean coffee, black, no sugar please" Ros sat down in a corner. Malcolm phoned her.

"I'm with Ros"

"What do you mean you're with Ros?"

"I mean, I'm buying coffee for her now"

"Where are you?"

"Across the road"

"Does she-?"

"No. I'm hoping to get to know her again"

"Malcolm…remember she's not who she was"

Malcolm hung up and sat down opposite Ros. It surprised him how timid she was now. She barely made eye contact at all. He made the first move.

"So, do you always have your coffee this strong?" Ros glanced up from her cup.

"Um, yes. It help keeps me going"

"So things are pretty busy at work then?"

She shook her head.

"My husband's taking most of the workload. I'm recovering from an accident." The word husband cut at his heart, but the spook within made him ignore the heartache.

"I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…"

She places her hand on his.

"Don't be silly. You weren't to know." She blushed "I've never been that open before"

Malcolm glanced at his watch.

"I'd better get going. Boss will kill me."

"Me too" Ros gave a small laugh. "You know. I never got your name"

"John Mills" Malcolm lied. Ros brushed a strand of hair from her eyes.

"Rosalind Mace. Well, goodbye John"

"Goodbye Rosalind"

As he watched her leave, a tear rolled down his cheek and dropped into his coffee. She had gone.

"Interesting lunch?" Mace asked as Ros returned to the office.

"No. Not really."

"You've changed your shirt"

"Yes, I spilt some coffee, so I had to get a new one. Y-you don't mind do you?"

"Of course not"

He kissed her on the lips and left Ros alone at her desk. Ros felt uncomfortable. Why had she lied to him about that man John? He was a sweet, harmless man and yet she felt something. She felt as if she had seen him somewhere before and she had liked his company. She had to see him again.

As soon as he got to his desk, Malcolm set about completing his legend. That way she could contact him if she could. Ros looked him up on the directory and dialled his number. Malcolm's phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hello"

"Um, it's Rosalind here. I-I was just wondering if you wanted to meet for lunch sometime?"

"I'd love to. How about tomorrow at the Moroccan restaurant next to the coffee shop"

"I'll see you there"

He hung up and ran into Harry's office.

"I've got her" It became obvious that Ruth hadn't told Harry.

"Got who?"

Malcolm gulped nervously. "Ros"

Harry rolled his eyes.

"Ros. You mean the same Ros who currently has no recollection of our existence and is married to the devil incarnate"

"Yes, that Ros"

"Good, good. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't missing anything"

Ros ate her dinner in silence, thinking about her life so far. Mace looked at her from across the table and noted the slight change in his wife's behaviour.

"What's wrong?"

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing. It's just that you seem different" She smiled.

"I'm just thinking about how lucky I am to get my life back"

"And?"

"And?"

"Are you going to answer everything with a question?" His tone had become harsh.

"No. I'm just tired. Today took it out of me"

"Well maybe you should go to bed then" There was a cold silence.

"W-what?"

"I said go to bed"

Ros got up from the table and did as her husband told her.


	5. doubts

Ros lay awake listening to the sleeping figure of her husband. It had been their first fight. Well, the first fight that she could remember. It was such a trivial one aswell. She wondered why it had happened. Did they argue before? Was their relationship at breaking point before the crash? Was he just staying with her out of pity? But if those things were true, then reaction didn't make sense. At the office, Ros had seen him look at her with genuine fear in his eyes, a fear that he would lose her. But she didn't understand why he was so scared. She could've walked out tonight after his behaviour. The thought had crossed her mind for an instant, but she hadn't. Why? Because she loved him, or at least she thought she did. She wasn't sure of anything anymore. Since the accident she had been having strange moments. Moments where she thought she should be living a different life. Moments where she felt like she didn't belong here, like this house wasn't her home. Moments where the world felt cold and unforgiving. She felt like that now. She felt like she should be somewhere else with other people, having different memories. She rolled over to look at Oliver. He seemed so peaceful when sleeping with that wry smile etched across his face. But then at times he seemed like a stranger, someone sinister and foreboding. Ros realised she was scared, scared of losing this man lying next to her. She felt isolated and redundant. Oliver didn't allow her to go anywhere alone, except for coffee. He said he didn't want her to get hurt. She had replied that she was fine, her leg only played up on cold days. He insisted that she listen to him. Insisted, it was more of an order. But she had obeyed nevertheless. After all, it was for her own good. _For her own good_. How many times had she heard those words? The nurses, the doctors, the physiotherapists, the psychiatrists, Oliver. The only person who hadn't told her what to do was John. John Mills, the stranger in the coffee shop. Only he didn't feel like one. Ros felt as if she knew him from somewhere, only she didn't know where. Just like she didn't know where the bathroom was, or where the cups where stored. She felt disorientated except for that hour in the coffee shop. For that on hour she felt like she knew where she was in the world, she knew who she was. Then she returned home and it was all lost. She was lost, lost in a pool of uncertainty. The past five years of her life had become a story. A story that she had been told again and again. She couldn't tell anyone if it happened or not. She could only guess. And her guesses had left her alone in the darkness, with a 1001 doubts in her head.

When Ros entered the office after her appointment, she saw a huge pile of lilies on her desk. Lilies, her favourite. She picked up the bunch of flowers and spotted a note tucked inside.

_'I'm sorry'_ it read.

"Am I forgiven?" Mace asked from behind her.

"Of course" she smiled. He offered her a coat.

"I've cancelled my appointments. Today I'm all yours. We can do whatever you want, see whatever you want, and eat whatever you want."

"Why are you doing this?"

" I've been waiting since the accident. A celebration of your survival. So what do you say?"

"I say breakfast at Tiffanys. I've always loved that film"

As she walked down the road, her hand linked in his. She felt a warm glow of happiness spread across her face. At this moment in time she was happy, one of her doubts was gone.


	6. the honeymoon was over

Two months had passed since their first meeting and they had finally arranged a meeting for lunch. However,Ros didn't show. Malcolm waited for one whole hour and then returned wearily to the grid. Ruth came bounding up to him, hope written across her face.

"So how did it go?"

"She didn't turn up" Malcolm slipped into his office and closed the door behind him. Harry had overheard the brief exchange.

"What do you mean she didn't turn up?"

"No call, no show, nothing. Not like the other times. Maybe you were right" she sighed, " maybe it's just too soon"

"I'm not so sure. This is Mace we're talking about. I'll call a surprise meeting with him"

When Harry entered Mace's office, he saw the exact reason why Ros had missed her lunch appointment. Her legs were entwined round Mace's waist and he was caressing her hair, which was free and flowing round her shoulders. Harry dodged a flying heel.

"Am I interrupting?"

The couple resembled a pair of rabbit caught in headlights. Mace cleared his throat.

"N-no, Ros and I were just d-discussing some files"

"I-I'll go get them now"

Harry smirked as he watched Ros tie her hair up and scramble round for her other shoe.

"Looking for this?" he said, waving the desired object. Ros snatched it from his grasp and rushed from the office, her face as red as a beetroot.

"So, you're still in the thralls of marital bliss then?"

"Oh, shut up" Mace retorted. He was still annoyed from Harry's interruption.

"Well, I was just wondering if you'd like to come to lunch?"

"Love to, but Ros-"

Harry chuckled. "I'm sure Ros can survive a couple of hours without you" _might even do her some good._

"No games?"

"No games" _not yet anyway._

"Fine. I suppose a couple of hours won't hurt." Ros flashed a smile as they left.

"She seems happy" Harry commented as they were placing their orders.

"She is" Mace went back to reading his menu.

" No memory problems then?"

Mace's head snapped up. "What do you mean?"

"No false memories, feelings of discontent, of a life not lived?"

"Of course not. She's perfect" Mace snarled.

"It's going to happen sooner or later, and when it does, we'll be there to pick up the pieces" Harry leaned back in his chair, taking in Mace's expression of frustration. Even he knew deep down what would happen. The return of Ros's memory wasn't an _if_, it was a _when_.

The slamming of the front door marked Mace's return home. "That bastard" he muttered under his breath as he stormed into the living room.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he spat. Ros looked up from her book.

"I live here in case you'd forgotten" she replied calmly.

"You're supposed to be at work. I take you home." Ros indicated to the clock on the wall.

"It's half past nine. How long were you intending to make me wait?"

"That's not the point"

"That's exactly the point!" she stood up to face him and a flash of the old Ros shone through, "you swan off and do as you bloody well please! Sometimes I feel like I'm not even your wife!"

"What did you say?" his tone was menacing.

"I said, sometimes I feel like I'm not even your wife. Sometimes I lie awake and think I should be lying _somewhere _else, with _someone_ else."

Mace hit her. Hard. Ros fell to the floor. Mace left her lying there. There would be no apologies in the morning. The honeymoon was over.


	7. instinct

There was only silence as they sat at the breakfast table. Neither would speak about the events of last night. Mace was frustrated at his loss of control. Ros was frustrated that she didn't return the blow. As she lay on the floor an immense feeling of power came over her. She had felt that she could've taken him on, but it was too late now. There was nothing she could do. Mace was panicking inside, it was happening. The outburst last night had proved it. He had to find some way to regain control. He went over to the sink to escape Ros's cold stare and the sight of her bruised face.

"I think it best if you don't come into work today" he stated.

"I agree, we wouldn't want anyone to see the results of your actions" she added the last part under her breath.

" Good. I'll see you when I get home"

"And what time would that be"

"Around eight" with that Mace left, he took both sets of keys and locked the door behind him. As soon as the door closed, Ros picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hello John. It's Rosalind. I just wanted to apologise for missing our lunch date. My leg was playing up a bit." She lied.

"T-That's fine. Would you like to reschedule?" Malcolm was in shock, from what Harry had told him yesterday he thought he had lost her for good.

"Yes. Is today alright? One o'clock, same place?" it wasn't really a question, more of a statement.

"I'll see you there" Malcolm whispered and hung up.

Jo plopped herself down on Zaf's desk.

"Did you hear the good news?"

" Nope. What is it?"

"Ros is getting her memory back. Well sort of, she's phoned Malcolm for a lunch date"

"But he's not Malcolm to her is he?"

"No" she begrudgingly agreed. "But it's a sign. Her unhappiness is a sign, she wants to come home Zaf, she wants to come home"

"How naff do you sound?!" Zaf laughed, but he never said she was wrong. If fact he prayed Jo was right. He prayed that Ros wanted to come home. Not only because what Mace was doing was wrong, but also because he had started a book on her and Malcolm. He had over £400 resting on them.

It was half eleven, Ros had an hour and half to get there. She also had to find a way out of the house first. As soon as the door had closed, she had known that he had locked her in. For that reason, she had decided that it would be better to wear trousers on this occasion. She could put her heels in her bag. Ros checked her reflection in the mirror one last time. For some reason, she felt it was important that she look good. And that the bruise, which covered half her face, didn't show. After she felt satisfied, she ran upstairs to the first floor guest room where she had stayed last night. A drainpipe was situated just below the window. She carefully opened the window and lowered herself onto the sill. She placed a tube of lipstick between the window and the sill so that she could get back in on her return. As she climbed down the pipe, she was thankful that it wasn't a cold day otherwise it would've been near impossible. Reaching the ground she ran over to Mace's second car and got in. she revved the motor and sped off down the drive, laughing as she went.

Malcolm smiled as he saw Ros enter the restaurant. She walked quickly over to his table.

"Hello John. I do hope I'm not too late. It was an absolute pain in the arse getting here!"

"No, not to worry, they only just brought the menus." He handed her one as she sat down.

"So, how have you been?" she asked as if they were old friends.

"Good. Work's not been too bad" _only 2 terrorist plots, instead of the usual 4_. "And you?"

"Fine, a bit tired every now and then, but Oliver's been very helpful" _when he isn't acting like a cold bastard or smacking me in the face._

The waiter came over to take their orders.

"I'll have the lamb," Malcolm said.

"Me too" the waiter scurried off.

"You know John. I have the strangest feeling that I've been here before." She had. It was for her, ruth and Adam's do. One to celebrate them surviving the Thames barrier debacle, the mace debacle and to wish them the best on their sabbaticals.

"Really? When?" he hoped for the best, but received the worst.

"I honestly don't know. Knowing my luck, probably in the last 5 years!"

They ate their meals, and their lunch was constantly filled with the chatter of their conversation. They talked about things they had done, things they hadn't done, their hopes, their dreams, their fears. Malcolm hoped that he would be able to settle down one day. Ros feared that she would never be happy again. When he asked her why, she had replied that since losing her memory she felt that she wasn't the same person. She said that sometimes she felt like she didn't belong and how desperately unhappy and lonely that sensation left her. After hearing that, Malcolm wanted to tell her everything, but he knew he couldn't. She had to work this one out alone.

They left the restaurant and Ros checked the time. It was half three, but she felt unusually tired.

"I think you better get back to work"

"You're right. Shouldn't you be getting back too?"

"No, I've got the day off" she lied. "Goodbye John"

"Well goodbye Rosalind"

"You can call me Ros"

"Goodbye…Ros"

He began to cross the road and turned to wave one last goodbye. Ros noticed the car coming towards him before he did. Instinct kicked in and she shrieked at the top of her lungs:

"MALCOLM!"


	8. remembrance

Malcolm jumped back in shock and narrowly missed the oncoming vehicle. When he turned to face Ros, he saw that she was clinging to a lamppost for support looking petrified and disorientated.

"Ros?" she didn't reply, she only stared at him blankly.

" Ros, it's going to be ok. I'll get you some tea to sort out your nerves" Malcolm then manoeuvred Ros through the street and into the coffee bar where they had first met since the accident. Malcolm called the grid, Ruth answered.

"Hello?"

"Thank god it's you"

"Malcolm, what's wrong?"

"It's Ros, I think she's going through a relapse. She called my name-"

"Your name? She called you Malcolm?"

"Yes, but now she's just staring into space!" panic had crept into his voice; Ruth sensed this and tried to calm him down.

"Don't worry Malcolm, its just shock. You know that, Ros is just trying to fit these _new _memories into the ones she already has. This is 5 missing years we're talking about."

"I know. But could you come down… I think this needs your touch."

"Fine. Where are you?"

"The coffee bar across the road"

"I'll be there in 5"

When Ruth entered the café, she saw how bad the shock was. Ros wouldn't respond to Malcolm at all, and just sat in the corner looking scared, confused and terribly alone. Ruth sat down opposite her and she made quick eye contact. Malcolm left them alone. Ruth thought it best to take things nice and slow even though they didn't really have the time.

"Hello Ros. I'm Ruth, Malcolm's friend" she had decided it would be better to use his real name.

"Malcolm?"

"Yes. Do you remember a Malcolm?" Ruth hated sounding so patronizing, especially towards Ros. Ros nodded in clear distress.

"Yes. But I don't know who he is" she sounded close to tears.

"Ok. Well do you know where you might have met him?"

"I'm not sure. I thought I saw him when that man nearly got knocked down"

"Do you know who that man is?"

"M-John. I think his name is john" Ruth was getting closer to cracking her.

"So why did you call him Malcolm then?"

"I don't know. I don't even know if he is John" Ros looked out the window and caught sight of Thames house. "The grid" she muttered under her breath.

"Pardon?"

"Is that building called the grid?" a grin passed over Ruth's face.

"Yes, yes it is. Have you seen Malcolm there perhaps?" Ros's face now mirrored Ruth's.

"Yes, yes I think I have!" fear had now left Ros. She was now that little bit more confident. Ruth got them some more tea and they continued their conversation. However, it wasn't really a conversation, in fact it resembled an interrogation. It was an extremely slow process but at the end of it Ros roughly knew who Malcolm was. Not exactly where or how she met him, but she knew him all the same. She still didn't fully know about the grid or Adam and the others, but with time that would come. Malcolm returned to the girls. Ros ran over to him and gave him a big hug.

"Malcolm!"

"You're back!" he said, more to Ruth than to Ros. Ruth nodded.

"She knows you at least," she whispered kindly. Ros planted one on his cheek.

"Malcolm" she sighed and buried her head in his shoulders, her eyes filling with tears.

" I thought I'd never see you again"

"Shit! It's half five!" Ros's mood changed completely.

"What's wrong?" he asked

"I have to be home well before 8!"

"Why?" Ruth chimed in.

"Because that's what time Oliver gets in" there was genuine fear in her voice. It pained both Ruth and Malcolm to see such a strong woman so scared of such a weak man. But they knew she had to get back. They had seen first hand what crossing mace could do. Ruth and Harry most of all.

"Do you know where your car is parked?" Ruth asked, in case she had forgotten.

"I think it's round the back. Thank you so much. With your help I think I can get my life back on track. Do you mind if we meet again?"

"Not at all" they both said at once. They were picking up the pieces, just as Harry had predicted.

"Thank you!" Ros cried once more.

Ros ran out of the café with a grin almost as wide as Zaf's.

Ros pulled up round the back of the house and got out of the car. It had become cold and the wind cut through her frail body. There was no sign of life coming from any of the windows. She checked her watch. It was 7 o'clock. He wasn't back yet. She began the long climb up the drainpipe. Her leg played up, causing her to slip once or twice but finally she made it to the sill. And found that the window was shut. "Shit!" she exclaimed. So he was back, and he knew that she had snuck out. _Snuck out. How old did she sound?_ She slid back down the pipe, traipsed wearily to the front door and rang the doorbell. Mace answered it.

"Hello darling. And how was your day?" he asked cheerfully.

"Just let me in" she wasn't in the mood for games.

"Not until you answer my question"

"My day was fine"

"Fine as in uneventful, or fine as in you don't want to tell me"

"Fine as in uneventful" she lied.

"Really?" he laughed " because I wouldn't class climbing out of a first floor window, sliding down a drainpipe and stealing your husband's car, uneventful. Would you?"

"You locked me in"

"You've just lied to me. Ring again when you're prepared to be honest." He began to close the door on her but she stuck her foot in.

"I'm prepared to be honest… I had lunch today with some people"

"Who?"

"Just some old friends"

"Who?" his tone had become threatening.

"Malcolm and Ruth"

"You stupid bitch" he spat as he hauled her into the house.

Malcolm and Ruth were in Harry's office discussing the day's events.

"So she really called you Malcolm?"

"Yes, she did" it felt so good for Malcolm to say those words.

"And she knew about the grid" Ruth added.

"The grid?" Harry said semi amazed.

"She saw it and automatically knew"

"Christ. She's buggered"

"How?" Malcolm demanded.

"Mace is going to be so pissed off, it will be unfathomable."

"What do we do? We just can't leave her! She has half a memory at best!" Ruth cried.

"We have to. This is now a domestic, between her and Mace. I'd hold on to your phones if I were you. Just in case."

"Just in case of what?"

"In case Ros needs help after beating the crap out of Mace, _the desk spook_" Harry chuckled. If Ros was coming back as they said, Mace was going to need all the help he could get. Yes, mace didn't know what was going to hit him.

Back at the house the argument had escalated into a full-blown fight. Though, it felt more like a beating, as mace was dealing most of the blows. He believed that he could beat her into submission, and it seemed to be working. For every blow he dealt to Ros, he received an apology. After half an hour, her body was black and blue, and her face, bloody. Mace pinned her against the wall.

"All I asked was that you did as you were told. This is your own doing you know."

"I know" she replied meekly.

"So what did they tell you?"

"Nothing"

"Liar!" he slapped her.

"They told me nothing, I promise you. Please, please forgive me. It will never happen again" she begged.

"I know, and I'd love to but I'm just too angry at the moment. Maybe after this" he hit her.

"Or this" he hit her again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

Until Ros was lying on the floor sobbing. As Mace leant in to deal the final blow, something inside of her snapped. He could beat Rosalind Mace into submission, but never Rosalind Meyers. As he face came close to hers, she head butted him and broke his nose. As he stumbled backwards, she kicked him in the groin. And as he tried to pull her back, she picked up a shard of broken glass and slashed his arm, leaving a line of blood parallel to the thin, silvery scar Harry had previously made. Ros burst out of the house and into the front drive. It had begun to rain. Ros started to run and didn't stop until she had passed through the hissing pods of Thames House, bloody, broken and drenched with rain. She was back.


	9. the ice queen melts

_**This last chapter is broken into two parts.**_

_**I hope you've enjoyed this fic, it's my first proper one so please read&review at the end!**_

But that night had been over a year ago and a lot had happened since then. Life had moved on and Ros had to move with it. She had lost most of her past, but she had her present and her future. Not many people in her profession could say that. It had been difficult in the beginning, especially dealing with past actions she couldn't remember. The clearest event in her mind was her reunion with Juliet. She had tried in vain to discreetly ask Ruth how Juliet came to be in a wheelchair. Unfortunately, Juliet had overheard and unleashed the story of her father's conspiracy and his car bomb that caused her to be the wheelchair. It was a story they were going to tell her when they thought she was ready. Luckily, she had been ready then. She only visited her father once since that discovery. And that was to tell him the good news. His response was satisfactory and she left knowing that she had completed her basic duty as a daughter. Ros had inkling to what put her in such a nostalgic mood tonight. Perhaps it was the weekly phone call from Ruth. But she had a feeling that it was most probably the soothing noises, which were coming from the baby monitor. She remembered that day so well. _'The day the ice queen melted'_ Zaf called it. Ros chuckled quietly to herself. It was true, she took one look into those eyes full of innocence and her heart did melt. But she was sure every new mother felt the same. That moment had been just under two months ago. Now, she was preparing for the christening. Hence, the late night phone call to Ruth and Harry. Henry's christening had been 4 months ago. The service had been beautiful, and Ros had felt honoured that Ruth had chosen her to be a godparent. She had been forgiven for a lot of things in the past year. If were fully down to her actions and decisions, there was a chance that Henry might never had been born. But he was, and as Ruth held him in her arms and as she in turn, held her own heavily swollen belly she knew everything was as right as it was going to get in the world. It wasn't perfect and she had made a lot of sacrifices to get here, they all had. But it was the best compromise they were going to get. Ros heard the baby stirring and hurried up the stairs to the crib in their room. She gently picked the infant up, settled into the rocking chair and began to rock back and forth. The baby let out tiny mews.

"Hush, Ophelia. Mummy's here now" Ros whispered gently.

Ophelia finally settled into sleep again but Ros continued to rock her for another hour before laying her back in her cot. It was a calming influence on her nerves. There were still times when she was struck with paralysing fear and uncertainty, but never when she was with Ophelia. Ros stroked her hair and kissed her on the forehead. As she watched her child sleep, Ros knew she had made the right decision. Not just about becoming a desk spook temporarily, but about everything and everyone, she had done it for her friends, for the man she loved and it had been worth it. As Ros climbed into her bed, she saw that the bedside clock read two thirty in the morning. She would get roughly two hours sleep before the next feed. Even though she had this limited time, she still paused a while to think. Sometimes she believed that the events of the past year had been one great story she had invented to fill the gaps of her memory. But she had decided that they weren't. No one could make up a story like that. She pulled the covers close and gazed at the sleeping figure next to her. Her fingers absent-mindedly traced patterns through his hair and she whispered his name…


	10. his name

"Malcolm"


End file.
